I thought...

People forget that I'm still the same shy me I used to be... I may be a little louder, a little bolder, and more outgoing... but deep inside I'm still shy and introverted. It takes a lot to make myself talk to people and to force myself out of my comfort zone.

People don't realize I still get hurt very easily by words and actions. I am easily hurt... I really can't help it. I try to not let things get to me, but I'm sensitive and there is not much I can do about it.

I thought I could trust this person with everything in my life, but every time that happens I get hurt. I don't think it's purposeful, at least I would hope not, but it stings... no, it cuts. She is one of the greatest people in my life, yet the tears I cry wouldn't show that. Maybe I'm too sensitive, but all I know is I'm hurt. I thought I finally had someone I could trust to talk to about my spiritual life... someone who enjoyed investing in me, but I guess I was wrong. I guess I'm just the same annoying me.

I wish I could let this person know, the only reason I'm so timid around her is because I look up to her more than anyone I've ever looked up to in my life. She is the sister I've never had, my spiritual role model... someone I hope I can be like. I model my faith after hers and I love her dearly... which is why her words and actions cut even deeper than anyone elses...

Maybe I just need to get over myself and this... it just hurts.
But I should be used to it...
If theres one thing I've learned in life it's that no one stays around for too long.